I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
Randomize
