The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
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