there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
smell my finger.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize