Yo dont text me then not text me
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
Randomize
