im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
Randomize
