How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize
