meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how do you play pong handcuffed?
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
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