im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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