Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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