I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Randomize
