its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
