Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
Randomize
