So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize
