How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
Randomize
