The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Randomize
