At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
You asked me to text you at 11 and remind you that he's 33. It's 11:20. He's 33.
you're too late. he has eggnog and whiskey and all seven seasons of buffy. I shan't be coming home tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
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