Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Randomize
