Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
I knew you were drunk when you poured scotch on a croissant and ate it.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
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