yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Randomize
