You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
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