To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
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