I'll bet she douches with gravy.
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
drinking out of a sandbucket again
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize
