Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Randomize
