My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
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