Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
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