It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
Randomize
