Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
