You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
