I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
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