He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
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