You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
Randomize
