your thong is hanging out like whoa
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
My doctor just informed me that my food allergies qualify me for a medical marijuana license. I get it on Tuesday. It won't help at all, but my life is awesome!
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
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