He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
Randomize
