I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize
