I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
Randomize
