fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
My Adderall prescription says to take my recommended dose and throw away any leftover pills. Why don't more prescriptions come with jokes like this?
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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