you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
Just rolled up to a matinee showing of THE HOBBIT. At the dollar theater. Alone. In sweats. With a fifth of sunnybrook and leftover pizza in a ziplock. There's a dude here in cape with his elderly mother. I'm handling this breakup FIIIIIINE.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize