In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
There should be a guide book that probation officers hand out on "how to tell a tinder girl about your ankle monitor before she notices it at the worst possible moment"
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Randomize
