i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
Dear god my vagina.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
