It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
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