I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
