literally had 100 drinks last night.
my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
I think my moral compass just broke
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