I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Randomize
