that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
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