$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
Randomize