Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Randomize
