90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
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