i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize
