My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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