We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
