let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
Randomize
